So much of my life I’ve know her, while she’s loved and cared for me.
Her personality has changed now, she worries so much more,
She doesn’t have steady footing, we have to watch the floor.
She creaks and groans doing just the smallest of tasks,
Her memories are fading, the same questions repeatedly asked.
Her skin is thin and her bones brittle, she’s often battered and bruised,
She can be angry and she can be bitter and really easily confused.
Most days I don’t recognise her for the woman she used to be,
But more often than that, and what hurts the most is that she doesn’t recognise me.
I’m getting to know her all over again, but the ‘her’ she is keeps changing,
So I have to adapt to be what she needs most while her needs are constantly ranging.
Every night when I tuck her into bed, and she’s got to know me through that day,
I pray to god she’ll remember tomorrow, so I don’t have to fight again to stay.
And I whisper the same thing, every single night, to the woman I once knew,
“Whoever you are tomorrow, I’ll love and look after you”
- Carers UK creative writing competition